My Eyes! My EYES!

Ok, here's one.

I just got back from break a few minutes ago. Maime had to leave early so I was sitting by myself, working on the Times crossword puzzle and minding my own business. It's about 45 degrees out there and (of course) raining. Out of the corner of my eye I saw someone rushing up the steps toward me, so I glanced up and saw a 30-year old woman with her water bill in her hand, obviously dropping it off to make her deadline. But, what I mostly saw was a muffin top - while I was assimilating that one, in January, she rushed past me and, even worse, from behind I saw whale tail.

If I'd looked closer I'd probably have seen camel toe, too.

Jaysus!
Where are the Fashion Police when you really need them?

P.S. Who comes up with these names, anyway? They're descriptive but icky.

Edited a couple of says later to say that, 1) I feel bad for making fun of this woman but she was kind of asking for it by dressing so WRONG and, 2) to give you a better idea of her dress - she was wearing a tight, black, midriff-baring t-shirt, and very tight, low-rise jeans. She was overweight just enough to make her clothes fit too small and, except for the black marks noted above, she looked nice. Oh, and her thong was blue.