AI: The Year You Were Born and Billboard Charts

Oh, how clever. The decided to start having 2 songs
from the kids (it was either that or go to 1/2 hour
and THAT wouldn't do!) so we had two themes last
night: Songs From the Year You Were Born and Top of
the Billboard Charts. or something

I was doing mundane chores before it came on - doing
the dishes, in fact, so I came in a bit late and
missed the first performance. Which was Elliott,
which I didn't know then, but figured out through the
process of elimination. And it turned out he sang "On
Broadway" which is a song I pretty much loathe so I
didn't really care anyway.

The night was a typical Idol mixture of
wretched and wonderful performances. Nobody put
together two good performances, which makes me wonder
what the hell is going on - somebody needs to help
these kids pick good songs!!! If they are getting
help, by now I'd be checking to make sure there were
no backroom deals going on.

Anyway, on with the show:

Paris: Paris' first song was "Kiss", which is a song
I always thought was called "You Don't Have to be Rich."

For this one she was wearing a white-with-
black-trim blouse and black capris, her hair was all
curly and cute and she looked very casual-chic. She
sounded Ok on the song, less screechy in the upper
register than usual. It was just OK. Hey, did she
say Prince was the God of Minnesota? I'm not sure I
heard that right.

Paris' second song was "Be Without You" (or is it
"Me") a song apparently by Mary J. Blige, but I don't
know because it's that convoluted, hipster,
screw-the-melody, r&b type of singing that makes
little sense to me. I HATED this song. HATE. Her
singing was again OK, but a bit nasaly. Hated the
ending. I also hated the camo shirt she was wearing.
Who dresses this girl?

Next up was my man, Chris. Chris' first song was
"Renegade" ("oh, mama, I'm in fear for my life from
the long arm of the law...." Styx) I always thought this
was a pretty cool song, and Chris did not let me down
- this was EXCELLENT! His key change at the end of
the song was fabulous. Chris nailed this song, the
judges loved it, the audience loved it, I loved it.

His next song was just a bit less successful. He sang
"I Dare You". The judges called him out on his
strained voice, and he admitted he's been practicing a
lot - they cautioned him to slow it down. The song
was overshadowed a bit by the director's choice to go
overboard with the flames and the red lights on the
stage, but the song was still pretty good.

Elliott: OK, his first song was "On Broadway" which I
missed but which in recap sounded pretty crappy. His
second song was a beautiful ballad called "Home." I
believe this song has been covered by Michael Buble -
of course, Elliott fits right into Michael's genre so
that just figures. It was a very tender and sweet
song and Elliott just excels at these types of songs.
He should be safe tonight but I bet he's definitely
towards the bottom.

Katharine: Kat's first song was "Against All Odds" and
it was arranged by someone who wants her out of the
competition. This song is one which she should have
nailed in her sleep, but someone screwed with it, took
it out of her range, changed the key so it was too
high and just generally fucked with it. It was a very
meh performance. They did clear up the mystery of the
wardrobe malfunction last week - she didn't realize
she had lost a button and the dress was open higher
than it should have been...hence, panty flash. This week she wore a
sleeveless black dress - with no buttons. She looked
gorgeous as always.

Her second song was much more entertaining. I don't
usually like singers to sit on the stage and sing
because it's just weird, but Kat sang the whole song
on her knees. She was accompanied by two men playing
box drums, she sang "Black Horse & Cherry Tree" and it
was a superb vocal. Perfect song for her and in the
perfect key. BTW, she was barefoot and had green nail
polish on her toes. Ryan had to point that out for Simon. The only drawback to the
performance was that sometimes her movements looked
just like she was humping the floor and that was so
not attractive.

Taylor: I just CAN'T like Taylor, which means that he
will probably win this whole stupid competition.

First song: "Play that Funky Music" which is probably
one of his staple songs in real life, and it sounded
like it - I agreed with Simon when he said it sounded
like a "horrible wedding performance." The audience
seemed to love it - he's probably a shoo-in for the
title, but I just don't like him at all (that is, his
singing style and mannerisms). Oh, God, this song sucked.

His second song was "Something" by the Beatles, which
is a gorgeous, tender song. He was OK on it, I
suppose, but I hated the way he fucked with the ending
to put his own "Taylor-stamp" on it...meh. I had to
laugh when Simon said after the performance, "It's
hard to remember with all your barminess, that you're
a very good singer." Barminess - hee!

My Bottom Two: Paris and Taylor
A More Realistic Bottom Two: Paris and Elliott (or
Kat)

Should go: Paris
Will go: Paris -
unless Paris' fans have been energized by her dismal
ratings of the last couple of weeks - then it'll
probably be Elliott)